It was daybreak, and Spooky of the Mailbox was just returning from a successful night of flower collecting. She was especially pleased with one flower in particular. It was deep red with polka dots that changed colors. The brighter the dots, the happier Spooky became. She decided to use her treasure to pin back a tuft of her pink hair. She looked radiant as she headed out to the Morphadoodle Community Garden to see if she could find anything that resembled her special blossom and to tell Zoey of her adventure.

When she arrived at the entrance to the Garden, Sun Smile had just begun to spread his warmth on the ground below, and Zoey was watering the seedlings in the Rainbow Garden. Upon seeing Spooky, Zoey put down her watering can to welcome her friend.

“Good morning, Spooky. What are you doing out so early in the morning? Is there something I can do for you?”

As Spooky walked closer, Zoey’s mouth hung open in disbelief. “That flower…it’s so captivating. I’ve never seen anything like it.”

Zoey stepped closer to examine the deep red specimen that had an orange stem, and bright blue polka dots. The Morphadoodle with two green thumbs immediately knew that this was no garden variety bloom. “It reminds me of a legend that I once heard about a place called Polkawood, but maybe it wasn’t a legend after all." She sniffed the blossom and turned to Spooky. “Where did you find it?”

“Last night when I was gathering pansies, petunias, daisies and daffodils, I decided to venture deep into the Laborastory forest, deeper than I had ever dared to go. I was flying over the far end of the MorphaZOOdle when a golden yellow pussy willow caught my eye. I swooped down to snatch it, and imagine my surprise when I discovered that it was not a pussy willow waving in the wind but the fuzzy tail of a yellow cat.”

“A cat?” asked Zoey.

“Yes,” said Spooky. “A cat named Buttercup. After I apologized for tugging on her tail, she stepped carefully toward me and studied me with her golden-green eyes. ‘You’re not from around here. Are you?’ she asked. Everything looked unfamiliar and I was beginning to feel lost and lonely. ‘Don’t worry,’ meowed Buttercup swishing her tail. ‘Follow me. I know someone who can get you home in a snap.’”

“We walked through the underbrush until we arrived at a small clearing where moonlight streamed straight down to the forest floor. Buttercup stopped at the entrance of a hollow log and told me that we needed to crawl through it together. We went quickly through, and I was surprised to see a bright sky ahead when there were so many hours of darkness still left in the night. ‘There’s magic in Polkawood,’ explained Buttercup, ‘just wait until you see what we grow here.’“

“When we stepped out of the tunnel, I couldn’t believe my eyes. A meadow stretched out before us that was filled with hundreds of polka dot flowers in every shade and hue. And there, in the midst of the burst of color, was a pink Morphadoodle fluttering about an easel with a paintbrush in her hand.”

“’Poppy,’ shouted Buttercup as we approached the smiling creature,'this is Spooky . She’s lost and wants to go home.’”

“Poppy turned to me and smiled. ‘I can help you. All you need to do is close your eyes,’ she said, ‘and paint a picture of your home using just your words.’”

“My words?” I asked.

“’Yes,’ said Poppy, ’and I’ll do the rest.’”

“So I stood there and told her all about my beloved corner of the woods until she told me to open my eyes. I couldn't believe how real the painting she had made looked."

"I want to go right inside and take a nap in my cozy mailbox,"  I said.

“’Why don’t you give it a try?’ she answered beaming. 'Come closer.  Place your hands on the canvas and think HOME.’”

“Won’t the paint be wet?” I wondered.

“She shook her head no. ‘This is no ordinary painting, Spooky. Trust me. I will not disappoint you.  After all, I am here to bring you joy.’”

“When I reached toward the easel, I felt a strange sensation.  It was as if the colors of the painting were pulling me inside.  One minute I was standing in a beautiful meadow touching the scratchy canvas; the next minute I was back in the Laborastory forest feeling the cool metal of my mailbox home.  I opened its door and saw something pulsing inside.  The bright polka dots of this flower," she said pointing to her hair. "It was a present from Poppy .”

Zoey was thrilled. “Spooky, you must have found Polkawood. You have to take me there.  I need to get a specimen of that flower for my garden.”

Spooky frowned. “But I don’t remember the way.”

“Not to worry," said Zoey as a thought popped into her head.  We'll go to the Leaf-Through Library. I'm sure Lizzie can help. That pup is a font of information.”

When the friends arrived at the library, Lizzie was all ears. She listened quietly as Spooky recounted her adventure of the previous night, jumped onto her feet at the mention of the cat with the pussy willow tail, and cocked her head with interest as Zoey told her what little she remembered of The Legend of Polkawood.

Lizzie dashed off and returned dragging the worn copy of The Book with no Cover, a treasure that she had discovered in the trunk of a fallen tree. She pushed the pages over with her cold black nose and let out a yip when she found what she'd been looking for. "Does this look familiar, Spooky?" she asked pointing to an illustration with her tail.

"Most definitely!" shouted Spooky, and Zoey began to cheer.

“Polkawood is a place where everyone and everything has an extraordinary attitude. A peppy pink painter named Poppy lives there. She is known as The Artist of Polkawood, famous for painting magical rainbows and growing polka dot flowers.  Her artistry has the power to spread joy.  There is never a cloud in Polkawood.  Poppy simply paints them away.  Bow WOW!" she barked.  "Poppy sounds like someone I’d like to know. There's only one problem," she said closing the book and turning to the pair.  "There are no directions to Polkawood in here."

"We'll never get there!" they wailed.

"Polkawood?  Were you just reading about Polkawood?" a familiar voice called out a from behind a stack of books. It belonged to Fuzzy, a Morphadoodle who loved to read. "I go there all the time.  Poppy's one of my very best friends."

"Really?" they asked.  "Then you must know how to get there."

"Of course I do," she answered pulling a beautiful painting from her backpack and showing it to the trio.

"The Polkawood!" shouted Spooky. "That's where I was."

"And that's where you'll be again if you trust in Polkawood magic," said Fuzzy adjusting his sunglasses.  "Come here, and we'll all touch the canvas."  Three pairs of hands and two front paws pressed against the painting.  A strange sensation came over them as if the colors were pulling them inside.  In an instant the Leaf-Through Library was empty, and four friends stood smiling in a meadow filled with polka dot flowers.  Fuzzy, Spooky, and Zoey went off to meet Poppy.  Lizzie had another idea.  She went in search of a buttercup that meowed.

It was Halloween night and Scary was flying across the face of the moon with Ghost with Hair in tow. “My favorite holiday,” he whispered darting past Crater 1 and tipping Pod over just for fun. “Everyone wants to be scary tonight, but I get to be SCARY every night.” Ghost with Hair glanced at his eight-eyed companion and shuddered just a little bit as the two entered the earth’s atmosphere. “Remember, little friend,” said the sinister Morphadoodle, “our mission is to get to the Tree with Many Trunks before the parade arrives. If Nicky did as he was told and set up the jack o’ lantern detour and my ingenious Slime and Slide, then when all those paraders make the turn, they will find themselves slipping, tipping and sticking in muck and I can finally get my hands on Goo’s Goo’s orange box.’’

Scary had been obsessed for a year with snatching the orange box from the round blue Morphadoodle ever since Goo Goo and his twin Sun Smile had left it on the curb to trick or treat at someone’s door. Not only was it his favorite color on the outside (which was reason enough for the attraction), but when he lifted the lid and peeked inside he couldn’t believe his octo-eyes. There were tons of video games in there and Scary loved to play. He actually had the box in his grip and was about to take flight when the only creature that could possibly scare him hopped toward him. A creature so appalling to Scary, that he dropped his jaw, dropped the box, and shot into the air screaming, “Help!!! I’m being chased by a Cuniculus!!!!!!!” “A Cuniculus?” said Goo Goo to Sun Smile, as the pair carried their Halloween booty back to the curb. “Is that Latin for a 7 foot tall Great Red kangaroo on its way to a kick boxing match?” “No,” said Sun Smile looking at the orange wake in the sky, “that’s Latin for cute little bunny rabbit with twitchy little nose and fluffy little tail.”

For 365 days Scary tried hard to erase that memory from his brain, but it hadn’t been easy. “If I don’t get that box this year,” he threatened, as The Tree with Many Trunks came into view, “I will be in a BAD mood for 365 more days…and you know what that means.” The tips of Ghost with Hair’s hair stood on end and a feeling of impending doom spread throughout his amorphous form. It wasn’t nice to see Scary in a bad mood for even one day – how could he possibly survive 365 more?

The billowy phantasm began to wrack his brain. “I could cook crab legs, shrimp and spaghetti for dinner,” Ghost with Hair thought, making a mental menu of Scary’s favorite foods, “but that would only satisfy him for one part of one day.”

“I could invite his friend Cary to come for a sleep over or take Ruffy for a walk,” he continued thinking as he watched Scary inspect the Slime and Slide trap. “But that only accounts for another day and a half.”

His worries were interrupted by the sound of merry-making Morphadoodles filling the night air. Scary motioned for him to help light the candle in the jack o’ lantern and the two slipped behind the giant pumpkin with the letters D… E… T… O… U… R… carved into it.

“Hmm,” said Electric, the Morphadoodle park ranger who headed the parade. “I don’t remember a detour, but I suppose we should follow it.” He turned his light beam head down the black path to lead the way. Pair after pair followed behind him, slid in the slime and stuck in the muck. Scary smirked at their dilemma and flew toward Goo Goo and Sun Smile who were trying to pull the orange box out of the trap.

“Let me help you with that, my friends” he said reaching down toward the box he had waited one year to hold. The pair made room for his hands and Scary began to pull, but something was wrong. His slime and muck were so thick that even he couldn’t release the box.

“What do we do now?” said Goo Goo beginning to cry. “Everything I own is inside.” “Don’t worry, little blue guy,” said Egg-Burto the Magician who appeared (as he often did) in the nick of time. “With one or two abracadabras I will have all of you free and on your way.” The Morphadoodles began to cheer. “Just a moment, everyone,” he said commandingly, “I’ll need an assistant to hold a few of my things so that I can put all of my effort into this trick.” His eyes rested on Scary whose body was surprisingly clean. “If you would be so kind,” he said, raising an eyebrow and removing his top hat that he held upside down, “would you hold my magic hat? I’m about to perform a powerful trick and would hate to have it land in this mysterious mess.” Scary nodded. “And, Sir,” Egg-burto continued, “make sure that Nibblet doesn’t hop out.”

“Did you say ‘hop’ out?” asked Scary, all eight of his eyes growing wide. “Please tell me that Nibblet’s a frog.” “A Frog?” shouted Egg-burto. “What magician pulls a frog out of his hat? Nibblet is a Cuniculus – a bunny rabbit with a twitchy little nose and a fluffy little tail.” Scary began to shake. “I believe,” continued Egg-burto, lifting his wand and tapping the brim one time, “that you met him last Halloween.” In an instant, out hopped Nibblet, who had only one word to say…….BOO!!!”

Scary’s eyes popped, his jaw dropped and he shot into the sky like a rocket.

Email (with attachment)

Fr: Professor Electra

To: Dr. Stalk

Drop everything (unless it’s a breakable test tube with a morphing doodle in it) and get here NOW! You won’t believe your eye!!! I was spelunking in the black hills of South Dakota when I spied this……….

It’s a drawing from the cave wall.

It’s a T-Rex. I’m sure of it – long body, short arms, short legs, HUGE teeth. But who could have drawn it? T-Rex was already extinct for 30,000 years by the time cavemen got here.

Oh and there’s a bunch of other shapes, too. One of them is the biggest oval I’ve ever seen. Another one is a giant triangle with little circles all over it. And if my eyes were not deceiving me I could swear I saw something that looked like a pair of c…..c….c…crab legs ---j…j…j… just crab legs and they were standing on a circle next to something that looked a lot like shrimp!!!! I’m very disturbed.

Hurry,

Professor Electra

E-mail

Fr: Dr. Stalk

To: Professor Electra

Take a few cleansing breaths, Professor. We don’t want your eyes to bug out any further than they already do. There are two things I must tell you before I Think and Blink and transport myself to the cave. Number One, I do not know how a cave person could have known about Tyrannosaurus Rex, but I suppose magic has always happened. Number Two, I am bringing Horatio. He might be able to decipher some symbols.

South Dakota here I come,

Dr. I. M. A. Stalk

After reading the email, Professor Electra turned off his computer and raced as fast he could on his bowed purple legs to meet his friends at the mouth of the cave. By the time he arrived, Dr. Stalk and Horatio had already dusted themselves off from their landing and were adjusting the lights on their miner’s hats to high beam. With no time to waste, Professor Electra gave them each a quick hug, turned on his over-sized flashlight and led the way into the darkness. The cave was spooky and leathery batwings flapped overhead, but the trio pressed on undeterred.

“There it is!” shouted Electra as his high beams struck a wall deep inside the cave, “The drawing of the T-Rex!” He scuttled towards it, and bounced his light across the span of the wall, revealing more and more of the painting’s complexity. Dr. Stalk and Horatio ducked their heads and anxiously followed him into the recess, their eyes growing wider with each step.

“Indeed,” it is the art of a cave dweller, but I won’t just need Horatio’s expertise in this effort,” said Dr. Stalk after several minutes of silent examination. “I will also need Chef Poire’s, because if I am correct, my friend, we are staring at the menu of the first restaurant. I believe,” he said, pointing one leafy hand to a white poof sitting on T-Rex‘s head, “that shape is the symbol for a chef’s hat.”

Then he lowered his light several feet revealing a long purple rectangle that “hung” under the T-Rex’s chin. “And that one,” he continued, tracing its outline, “is an apron – absolutely, an apron.” Dr. Stalk paused and faced his friends, a look of consternation clouding his eye, “Could it be that the very dinosaur we deem to be the most terrifying was just a nice guy who liked to cook?”

“Quite possibly,” said Horatio, who was using a tail feather to sweep ancient dust from a row of glyphs. “His name was Jacob the Chef T-Rex”, he read, “and he must have been nice. He liked to dance. He liked the color green because green means LIFE. And, he had a pet – a dog called Game (because he liked to play games).”

“Intriguing” said Dr. Stalk, straightening his scarf and preparing to transport himself to the Eiffel Tower. “I must retrieve Chef Poire from La Boulangeroodle at once. Horatio,” he said right before he vanished into thin air, “if you could have the ancient entrees deciphered by the time we get back, I would be most appreciative.”

“Will doodle-do,” Horatio crowed and that’s precisely what he doodle-did. Upon their return, for the first time in millennia, Jacob the T-Rex Chef’s menu was read out loud:

“Shrimp and Crab Legs Stegosaurus (Sorry, Professor Electra, crustaceans have always been popular with the palette)

Pterodactyl Eggs Over not so Easy (made with the world’s biggest and heaviest eggs)

Spaghetti with Woolly Mammoth Meat Balls

“And...” he said cackling, “Something’s just never change! The last item and the Specialty of the Cretaceous Period:

A slice of pizza with extra cheese!”

It was another sunny day in the Morphadoodle meadow and Goo Goo and Sun Smile were playing a friendly game of hide and seek.

“1,2,3…” Sun Smile counted from behind a cloud as Goo Goo dashed about looking for a clever hiding spot. He had his trusty orange box with him, so he needed to find a leafy bush or some really tall grass to disappear from view.

“9, 10, 11…” Sun Smile continued. Running out of time, Goo Goo hesitated at the edge of the forest. From where he stood, he could see a tree with brightly colored leaves flapping in the breeze. The tree had a big thick trunk – wide enough to hide his orange box. It was darker in the forest, but it was still day light and he figured that Sun Smile would find him rather quickly. Goo Goo took a deep breath, dashed behind the tree, dove headfirst into his orange box and waited for his cheerful friend to shine above him.

Goo Goo waited, and waited, and waited some more. He waited so long in his favorite orange box that the chirping and buzzing of the forest lulled him to sleep. He slept deep into the night. Suddenly, his box began to move. He was jostled around to the left, to the right, tilted left again, and fell out onto the ground with a THUD. Now wide awake, Goo Goo opened his eyes to see a large brown snout and wet pink tongue approaching. The nose sniffed and snorted. The tongue licked and tickled. Finally, he saw the kind eyes of a very surprised MorphaZOOdle dog who let out a startled yip.

“Oh my goodness! I didn’t know that anyone lived in this box. I saw it behind my tree and thought it would be a nice addition to my collection of treasures. I am Lizzie, the great finder of all things. I just have a nose for it I suppose.”

Relieved to find himself in the company of such a friendly dog, Goo Goo said, “Well, I was waiting to be found, but now it’s dark and Sun Smile is gone. I don’t like the dark.”

“Well, lucky for you I sniffed out your fine orange box and brought you to the Leaf Through Library. It’s quite late and you should be asleep. Your friend Sun Smile should rise in just a few more hours. Make yourself comfortable and I will read you a special poem from the “Book with No Cover”.”

Lizzie opened her book to a dog-eared page, gave a little bark to clear her throat and began to read:

“Xian Xian The Love Rat”

If you are ever frightened

When the sun turns out her light

You can always call for Xian Xian

To help you through the night

She will slip out from her soft nest

In the hollow of a tree

And bring The Sandman’s crystals

Wherever you may be

If you’re a wee bit hungry

She will share a bedtime snack

And if you need some comfort

She will gently rub your back

She will whisk away loud noises

With her rainbow-colored tail

And you will soon

See The Man in the Moon

On his nightly journey sail

If you’d like to thank her

Upon waking the next day

Draw a picture of your dream

And send it Xian Xian’s way

Mail it to:

Xian Xian The Love Rat

c/o the Hollow Tree

Deep in the Park

(The Tree that’s filled with Music

When Daylight turns to Dark).

Lizzie quietly closed the book and asked “Did that poem make you feel better, Goo Goo? …Goo Goo?”

But Goo Goo did not answer. He had fallen into a deep slumber and was dreaming of the picture that he would send to Xian Xian’s hollow tree.

I

Zoey was confused. “I could have sworn I planted this patch of the Community Garden with carrots – dozens of them.” She scratched the top of her heart-shaped head and knelt down to look closer at the ground. Sure enough there were rows upon rows of perfectly empty holes. “Somebody’s

been eating my carrots,” she said, and set off to talk to Dr. Stalk.

II

Egg-Burto the Magnificent was confused. He had just reached into his magic hat to pull out his trusted rabbit when he discovered that there was no hare there. He checked his watch. “I could have sworn I told Nibblet that rehearsal would begin promptly at 9.” He said a few magic words, waved his wand, and reached back into his hat. This time he pulled out a few very crunchy looking crumbs. “Somebody’s been eating with my rabbit,” he said and set off to talk to Dr. Stalk.

III

Professor Electra was confused. The picture he was developing in his dark room had just come to light. “I could have sworn I was photographing a swarm of white butterflies with black spots– the common pierrot – but,” he said, dipping his eyes stalks as close to the sheet as possible, “there’s something else captured in this picture.” He reached behind him and took a magnifying glass from a shelf. He held it over one particular corner of the photograph. He gasped, “This is noooo butterfly,” he said, his eye stalks bobbing up and down. “Oh it’s white and it’s got wings all right, but unless I’m mistaken,” he said as he slipped the photograph carefully inside his backpack, “somebody’s been fiddling with my photograph,” and he set off to talk to Dr. Stalk.

IV

As soon as he opened the door to the Lab, Dr. Stalk’s head began to spin. Zoey, Egg-Burto and Electra were talking all at once. “Friends,” Dr. Stalk said, raising his leafy hands, “I can’t possibly help you unless you each take a deep breath and calm down.” The three Morphadoodles looked at each other, inhaled and let out a collective sigh. “Now,” continued the green scientist, “let’s examine the facts.” He took out his clipboard and pen and turned his large eye to Zoey.

“Missing carrots,” she said, “dozens of missing carrots.” Dr. Stalk wrote, “Carrots uprootus” and turned to Egg-burto who said, “Nibblet is missing, and I found this stuff where my bunny should have been.” The magician handed Dr. Stalk the crumbs. He studied the particles through his monocle, took a sample taste of the kernels and wrote, “Hare nowhere/ Cerealus and canine crunchus there.”

When it was Electra’s turn, the purple professor thrust the photo into his friend’s hand. “Well?” he chirped, hardly giving the scientist a moment to analyze the fluffy, four legged, winged creature flying among the gentle butterflies. “What do you think? What do you think?” Dr. Stalk examined the picture for several seconds while his anxious friend scuttled back and forth. “I think,” he said at last, with a bright eye and a wide smile, “that you have photographed ‘Bunnoggy’ our adventurous Morphadoodle who has been missing since the day he popped out of the test tube.” Dr. Stalk turned to Zoey and Egg-Burto. “And I think,” he added, “that your evidence is further proof that Bunnoggy is very close by.”

“Our evidence?” they said together. “Absolutely,” replied Dr. Stalk. “Bunnoggy is half bunny and half dog. He’s been roaming the forest for weeks – looking for food – looking for friends. He found rabbit food in your Garden, Zoey and a rabbit friend in your Nibblet, Egg-Burto. And if my logic serves me correctly all we have to do is to follow some paw prints to find his canine companion and fellow cookie cruncher.”

As if on cue a dog barked just east of the giant oak tree. “Sounds like Lizzie,” said Electra. “LIZZIE!!!!” all four Morphadoodles shouted and they bee-lined down the path toward the cleverest dog in the forest. When they arrived they found her and Nibblet curled up against what looked like a fluffy cloud - a cloud with kind eyes, the ears of a rabbit, the tail of a dog and a pair of sky blue wings – Bunnoggy, the missing Morphadoodle. After a morning of chasing fast balls and faster cats, they were sharing a dish of ice cream and a pawful of doggie biscuits whose crumbs looked remarkably familiar.

I

It's the final game of the Out of This World Series at Yankeedoodle Stadium.  Bottom of the ninth, and the dreaded Smelly Sox have pulled ahead by one run at the top of the inning.  Now with two outs and bases loaded, Peter steps up to the plate wiping pancake syrup from the corner of his mouth.  Anxious, he swings at the first pitch....Strike one.  He looks at the umpire and shakes his head.  He sets up....  Pitcher throws a curve ball....  Peter swings and misses.  Strike two.  Peter steps away from the plate, and knocks the dirt from the bottom of his shoes.  Pitcher throws high....  Ball one....  Pitcher throws low.... Ball two.  Pitcher throws wild....  Ball three.  It's a full count.  The crowd is on its feet or fins or flippers or claws (this is the Yankeedoodle Stadium, after all).

"You can doodle-do it, Peter!" crows Horatio.  And then the pitcher winds up and hurls a fast ball right down  the middle.  Peter hits it and hits it hard.  The ball sails foul and makes a beeline for a host of spectators holding their gloves out hoping for that one perfect catch.  It sails past Professor Electra.  It sails past Egg-Burto the Magnificent.  It sails past Isabella the time traveler and lands smack in the middle of Prince David's glove.  Triumphant, he turns to his friends to share his good fortune, when POOF!  He disappears.

The crowd is stunned into silence then thrown into chaos.  In the midst of it all, Egg-Burto nods at Electra and Isabella, mutters a few magic words into his hat, and three more Morphadoodles vanish in a puff of smoke. 

II

"Where are we?" asked Prince David, dusting off his crown and turning toward his three friends.  "And what happened to my glove?  There was a baseball in it that I wanted Peter to sign."  Professor Electra cleared his throat. 

"The baseball and glove are safe in the twenty-first century, Prince David.  We, on the other hand, are in the twelfth century.  We have been called to King Arthur's Court.  There is a puzzle that needs to be solved."

"A puzzle?  I'm excellent at solving puzzles," said the prince.

"That's precisely why I was told to transport you here," said Isabella.  As the four began their walk/scuttle/float toward Camelot, Egg-Burto bowed to the Prince and said in his most deferential tone, "Consider me your Merlin."

III

The approach to Camelot was lush and green just as the history books described it- roads cut by heavy cart wheels, grass trampled from trotting horses, the hillside dotted with grazing sheep.  Banners waved proudly above the castle walls, knights marched along the parapet, and the drawbridge lay down in welcome.  But something was wrong.  This was a place know for its JOYFULTY, but no sounds of happiness could be heard from within.  "Something is DEFINITELY wrong," Prince David said to his companions.  "The sooner we find the king, the sooner we solve the problem."

IV

Arthur and his knights were sitting in silence at the Round Table and rose to their feet when the four Morphadoodles entered the Grand Hall.  "Thank you for coming, Prince David," said the gracious king.  "I will cut to the chase.  There is a dragon holed up in a cave- our last dragon- the perfect dragon for Camelot.  He has always been friendly and kind.  He has sparked our kindling for bonfires.  Our children have hiked up his spikes and slid down his tail.  But he has changed.  Three time a day he bellows and roars.  His flames scorch the earth around his cave.  My bravest knights cannot penetrate the heat.  You fear NOTHING, Prince David.  I beseech you- use your power to bring JOYFULTY back to my kingdom."

V

Prince David's eyes were wide.  What could one young Morphadoodle do that King Arthur's knights could not?  "Treat the problem like a puzzle," thought David, "like the most complicated lego structure I have ever built." 

He turned to the king, "Did you say he bellows and roars three times a day?"  The king nodded.  "What times of day?" 

The king thought for a moment.  "7:30 am, noon, and around 6:00 in the evening."  The wheels inside David's head were turning. "Why, those are meal times," he said.  "Perhaps the dragon is hungry."

"We bring him crusty bread every day, just as we always have, and leave it at the foot of the mountain," said the king.  "When we return the next morning, it's gone."  David stepped away from the king and huddled together with his friends.  Words flew back and forth among them.  The brave lad finally turned to the king and said, "I will accept this challenge, King Arthur.  I will bring JOYFULTY back to your land."

VI

The next morning at dawn, the Morphadoodles carted the dragon's bread to the foot of the mountain.  But instead of leaving, Egg-Burto cast a spell and made all four invisible.  When the sun rose, a very thin dragon slunk out of his cave and headed toward his food.  When he saw the crusty bread, he bent down, took a bite, and winced in pain.  Tears fell like a waterfall from his eyes.  He roared and tore the bread into little pieces, toasting them with his flames.  Twenty-four blackbirds swooped down to dine while the miserable dragon lurched up the mountain.  Egg-Burto reversed his magic and made them all visible once again.  "I know what the problem is!" Prince David announced triumphantly.  "The dragon has a toothache.  The hard crust hurts his mouth!"

Prince David  sprang into action.  "Isabella, fly back to Chef Poire's Boulangeroodle and have him whip up a batch of his pancakes and a vat of hot chocolate.  Electra, give me one of your spikes to remove the foul tooth.  Egg-Burto, at noon, when the dragon roars again, freeze him while his mouth is wide open so I can perform the extraction.  If I am correct, within the hour, all will be well in Camelot."

"If you are wrong," thought Egg-Burto, "you might be lunch."

VII

But Prince David wasn't wrong.  Once his tooth was pulled and his belly was full of pancakes and hot chocolate, the dragon regained his stature in Camelot.  David and his three companions flew forward through time and found themselves once more in the stadium, David's arm outstretched with a foul ball hit by Peter in his glove.  And, by the way, Peter's next hit was a grand slam.  The Yankeedoodles won the game!

Dr. IMA Stalk was having a terrible night's sleep.  Even though he had fashioned a comfortable bed of lettuce in the crisper drawer of the Lab's refrigerator (where he slept nightly to maintain freshness), within an hour he had completely tossed it.  Something was preying on his mind.  So he pushed open the door, checked his watch by the light of the naked bulb, and padded over to sea green hammock that hung in the opposite corner.  He stood for a moment staring at the sleeping body of his friend Professor Electra, his one large eye looming like a giant moon.

"Electra...Electra...," he whispered nudging the hammock with one leafy green hand.  "It's imperative that you wake up!"  But that didn't happen.  In his effort to gently rouse the crustacean-like creature (knowing full well the power of his pincers when he was startled), he had caused a rocking motion instead, and the rhythmic swaying had sent Electra deeper into dreamland.  The peripatetic professor began to sing, "Rock-a-bye doodle on the tree top" with a sweet smile plastered on his face.

Dr. Stalk tried again, this time speaking a little louder and pushing a little harrder, but only Electra's song changed.  "Row row row your doodle gently down the stream..."  Exasperated, Stalk shouted, "Electra, WAKE UP!"  and pushed so hard that the hammock did a three sixty sending the little guy into momentary orbit.  He landed with a thud on the lab table next to a solitary beaker marked CRABBY- a beaker whose contents were uncharacteristically still.

Electra's stalks bent down to his short arms so he could rub the sleep from his eyes.  "Dr. Stalk, is that any way to welcome me home?"  He checked the clock that hung on the wall.  "It's 2 am, are we supposed to be night fishing or something?"

Dr. Stalk sighed regaining his composure, "No, my friend, but I couldn't wait another millisecond to find out if your trip was a success."  He turned to stare at the quiet beaker.  "I was afraid that if you didn't make it to Boston Harbor, this doodle would never morph."  He picked up Crabby's data sheet.  "I'm sure that a drop of the Atlantic is the ingredient we need to turn this mixture into a solution."

Electra smiled, yawned, and side-stepped over to his knapsack.  He reached in and pulled out two items: a stoppered test tube and the front page of a newspaper.  "First things first," he said and handed the test tube to Dr. IMA Stalk, a sample of the ocean bobbing inside.  Stalk put on his protective eyeglass and poured the salty water into the beaker.  Within minutes the contents started to shake, then swirl, then sputter.  "Likes fishing, ocean, crabs (check)... dislikes sharks, people (check)... fears Mitchell (check)...has a friend named Bog (check)...loves pizza (check)...is funny(check check check)!"  Then after a blast of gas and a crack of glass, Crabby stood before them.

"Mission accomplished!" shouted Electra.  "Can I go back to sleep now?"  He began to stuff the paper back into the pouch.  "Only after you show me what else you brought back," said Stalk.

"I'll show it to you in the morning, after you've had some sleep," said Electra nervously.  Dr. Stalk would not wait, "Electra, were you SEEN by the humans?"

"Well, possibly seen but not identified," and he held up the front page of The Boston Globe.  Dr. Stalk's mouth fell wide open.  There was a photograph of Electra with his camera in one claw and a flag bearing the likeness of Patrick Henry in the other.  He was standing dockside at Boston Harbor surrounded by cheering crabs that he had sprung from a giant trap.  The caption read: Unidentified Purple Crab Cracks Casing Shouting, "Give them liberty. Don't give them broth!"

Some Advice for Snoozle

by Egg-Burto the Magnificent

What do you doozle

When you've morphed into Snoozle

Are you silly all through the day?

Must you always grant wishes

Scoop ice cream in dishes

Fear thunderstorms heading your way?

It's easy to think that

Your data was down pat

Both Margo and Brady agree

But examining closer

Your fear of snowmen, sir

Is something I'd rather not see

It could ruin your winter

Like a lion paw's splinter

And I think that I might have the fix

When you come upon one

Don't come undone

Morph it! From MY bag of tricks

Turn that snowman around

From a seasonal clown

To your favorite confectioner's treat

For unless they are sallow

Three tiers of marshmallow

Make one snowman that you'll LOVE to eat!

"Are you sure this is a good idea, Crunch?" Stik Ladee asked nervously?  "What if it doesn't work?"

"Not to worry my friend.  Everything is under control.  I've seen Egg-Burto do this at least a thousand times."

Stik Ladee wasn't exactly sure how she had gotten herself into this predicament, being waved back and forth through the air in Crunch's strong grip.  She did know, however, that this would not turn out well.  "Crunch, I wish I could help, but I'm getting dizzy.  Why don't you wave your fly swatter instead?"  Stik Ladee breathed a sigh of relief when Crunch gently placed her at the foot of Miss Princess's tree house.

Crunch was beyond excited...his toothy grin even wider than usual.  He had Miss Princess's much-too-tiny cape stretched around his circular frame.  "I have my magic wand and my cape.  All that's missing is a magic hat.  No matter.  The show must go on."  He bowed to his devoted audience and said, "Prepare to be amazed.  In the blink of an eye, I will make myself disappear."  With a flourish of his wand and the magic words, "Eenie-Meenie-Chili-Beanie," Crunch vanished.

Well, he didn't actually vanish.  It would be more accurate to say that he jumped high into the treetops, out of sight.  Crouching on a sturdy branch overlooking the Laborastory forest, Crunch realized something: his audience would undoubtedly expect him to reappear.  "What goes up must come down," he muttered to himself.  "Look out belooooowwwww!" he shouted as he jumped from his perch, fly swatter wand flapping in the breeze.

We'll skip (or jump?) over the details of Crunch's not-so-smooth landing.  Suffice it to say that Miss Princess's tree house is currently closed for repair, and our dear Crunch's magic trick didn't turn out as well as he had hoped.

Never one to give up, Crunch decided to get some professional help from the one and only Egg-Burto the Magnificent.  After devouring a delicious shoofly pie (the swatter came in handy after all), Crunch headed over to the magical Morphadoodle's  theater.

"Crunch, come on in and have a seat," Egg-Burto called from the stage.  "I'm almost finished practicing for tomorrow's show.  Hey, I like the cape...a bit small, but it flows nicely.  You look like you're ready for some magic."

"Actually, I was hoping that you could help me with a trick I have not yet perfected.  I have been trying to make myself disappear without success.  Do you think I could borrow your wand and magician's hat and give it another try?"

Egg-Burto hesitated for a moment but looked at Crunch's sad expression and could not say no to this kind and generous fellow.  Armed with Egg-Burto's wand, an authentic magician's hat balanced on his head, and wearing his wide, toothy grin, Crunch gave  the wand a gently whoosh and said, "Eenie-Meenie-Chili-Beanie."  Crunch opened his eyes and looked around, disappointed to see he was still standing on the stage.

"Egg-Burto," he said sadly, "I don't think it worked."  There was a long silence.

"Egg-Burto?" Crunch nervously called out.  "Egg-Burto, where are you?"

"I'm over here, Crunch.  No need to panic or fly off the handle.  I think you've made me invisible.  Put my wand and hat down on the table, and I will work my magic."  Crunch sheepishly did as the kind magician asked.  As promised, he soon found himself looking into the eyes of the loveable egghead.

"Oh, you're back!"  Crunch embraced his friend and began to jump up and down with happiness.  "Careful Crunch!" Egg-Burto warned, "Take it easy or you'll scramble my insides!"

Crunch took a deep breath and gently placed his fragile friend on the ground.  "I'll never be able to be a magician.  Even with all my magical accessories, I can't manage to get this trick right."

 "Don't be sad, Crunch.  How would you like to be my not-so-lovely assistant at tomorrow's show?  I could use a little help."

"Yippee!"  Crunch shouted.  Unable to contain his excitement, he jumped high into the air.  The building shook as all 4,000,000,000 pounds of him landed dangerously close to Egg-Burto.

The next day, the Morphadoodles gathered at Egg-Burto's theater to see Crunch's debut as the "not-so-lovely" assistant.  Everything went as planned.  Crunch wheeled in the props, he allowed himself to be magically cut in half, and he vanished and then reappeared with a wave of Egg-Burto's wand.  He was doing so well that Egg-Burto thought he was ready to fly solo and invited him to do the final trick: pull Nibblet the rabbit out of his hat.

The stage was dark and the spotlight was shining on Crunch who was appropriately dressed for the occasion.  Wearing Miss Princess's cape, Egg-Burto's magic hat, and waving his fly swatter wand, Crunch proudly announced, "Prepare to be amazed as I pull Nibblet out of this empty hat."  He removed the hat from his head and showed the audience that it was, indeed, empty.  He cleared his throat and with a flourish of his wand began to chant the magic words, "Eenie-Meenie-Chili-Beanie."

Miss Princess held her breath in anticipation.  Stik Ladee braced herself for a Crunchquake.  Egg-Burto backed into a corner.  Crunch reached his claw into the hat, and what did he pull out?

No, it was not the sweet, furry Nibblet.  No.  Crunch reached his claw in and pulled out not one fly but a whole fistful of buzzing flies.  Fly swatter in hand, Crunch began excitedly chasing and swatting flies because all of this work had given him an appetite for a juicy shoofly pie!

To: Captain Potato

From: Nicky

Subject: If You Need Another Pirate

My name is Nicky

Some people say I'm rude

I like to be THE MEAN GUY

I gobble toads for food

I crush anything I want to

I do it just for fun

I pack a sack of bullets

To keep "good guys" on the run

I can fight using weapons

I can fight using words

I can fight the strongest bullies

I can fight the weakest nerds

There's just one thing that I must know

Before I join your crew

Do any little kitties

Ever sail the seas with you?

I'm not a fan of felines

I don't like them at all

They hiss

They scratch

They cough up

A gross and furry ball

So "dear" Captain Potato

If you would like me in your rank

Gather all your cats together

And have them purr-fectly walk the plank